Have you noticed when you encounter a child and acknowledge their remarkable-ness, such as their smile, shoes, dinosaur shirt, hard work, or kindness, they light up? Guess what? It works for adults too.
We often walk through our lives bumping into each other without truly SEEING one another, and the light we carry within. I was at a yoga training class a few weeks ago seated next to another yogi. While waiting for the instructor, we struck up a conversation. As I sat and listened, she opened up about her heritage, her visit with her mother, the transformation she experienced in that visit, and how it shaped parenting her young daughter. I had never met this woman, and yet we held sacred space. I saw her; she was whole, creative, resourceful, and filled with the human experience balancing joy and pain. And she saw me and trusted I could hold space for her while she shared her experience. The crazy thing was this happened in a matter of about 10 minutes. It was precious, and I will never forget her face as she lit up talking about her 4-year-old, or the relief she felt in reconnecting with her mother in an authentic way. This connection was so precious, and I was humbled, awed, and grateful.
Rabbi Sharon Brous, in her book, The Amen Effect, describe the ancient Jewish pilgrimage ritual from Temple times, 2000 years ago, where Jews would travel to Jerusalem. They would climb up the steps of the Temple mount and would turn right. Thousands would enter through an arch and circle around the perimeter of the courtyard of the Temple on the holiest of days on the holiest of land. A massive movement of people would travel the perimeter of the Temple, except for the broken hearted. Those who had lost loved ones, experienced a crisis, or lived in heartache would enter through the same arch, but they would turn left. The whole world would be walking in one direction, and they would be walking in another direction. The people who were okay that day would stop, see this person who was suffering, and simply asked them what happened. That person would share their pain and their story. Then those who had stopped to ask would acknowledge their suffering and offer a blessing: “May the One who dwells in this place hold you with love as you navigate this difficult time.”
This is the embodiment of being seen. When we travel our road and someone sees us and acknowledges our being-ness, there is a sense of belonging to each other.
We live full lives of deep joys, heartbreaking losses, and a lot of stuff in between. There is a longing to connect and belong, to be seen. The next time you encounter another person, maybe at the checkout counter or holding a door, pause a moment and take a look. Really see them and their light. A smile, a nod, or a silent blessing may be the small miracle they need in that moment.
If you wish to be seen, Let’s talk.
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