I recently lost a cherished friend, mentor, co-conspirator, wise woman, and bright light in my life. Thelma was 96 (40 years my senior), and she lived a bold, beautiful life. She loved family, sought beauty in all ways possible, and was so deeply spiritual her life was a prayer.
Thelma was a trailblazer and a rebel, boldly challenging patriarchal norms in male-dominated spaces. After serving as a Catholic Sister of Charity for 15 years, she spearheaded the movement to transition nuns from traditional habits to secular clothing. Her passion for indigenous cultures blossomed during her work with Indian Health Services, which later led to her role as Executive Secretary for Health in the federal Department of Health, Education, and Welfare.
Throughout her career in healthcare, Thelma broke barriers as the first female executive at Samaritan Healthcare Services. She eventually started her own business and penned a weekly column, Ask Thelma, where she critiqued the decline of proper etiquette among leaders and youth, promoting instead a modern blend of cool and gracious “heartsense” — the innate wisdom of the heart that shapes every personal interaction.
An avid traveler, Thelma found beauty in culture, art, and humanity. Food was one of her love languages; she could whip up a gourmet Italian banquet, where I often had the good fortune to serve as her sous chef.
The kitchen wasn’t the only place where Thelma made an impact. Across the state, she was celebrated as a gracious and pragmatic leader, deeply committed to nurturing emerging and mid-level talent. While she excelled in business acumen, Thelma’s true mastery lay in the art of human connection, which is the intricate, sometimes messy, work of leading people.
In our 30-year friendship, these are the lessons I am most grateful to have learned from “My Thelma:”
Be a Champion, a Mentor, or a Sponsor, Especially for Women
Encourage and empower the next generation of women leaders.
Seek Beauty in All Its Forms
At the core of every human being is beauty; through beauty, we reconnect with the Divine.
Celebrate, Laugh, and Don’t Take Yourself Too Seriously
Find and enjoy those joyful moments.
Travel and Explore the World and Other Cultures
It broadens our horizons and opens our minds to new possibilities. We gain a deeper appreciation for the diversity of our world and the interconnectedness of its inhabitants.
Tell People You Love Them
Thelma and I ended every call and visit with “I love you.” Seize the many opportunities to tell the people in your life that you love them.
Surround Yourself with Intergenerational Friends
The exchange of diverse perspectives, wisdom, and life experiences enriches our lives, broadens our horizons, and challenges the confines of our preconceived notions.
Seek Genius
Know your strengths and fill in the gaps with experts.
Serve Others and Important Causes
Raise or donate money, advocate, and volunteer.
Seek Your Wisdom
In God, in Nature, in Humanity, in Science, and/or in Yourself.
Thanks for being here Thelma. I love you forever.